Honesty

I was listening to an old Mp3 of one of my mentors. He was talking about the Kingdom of Heaven breaking into our hearts, and how God prepared the way through John who called out "repent". He has this really cool discussion about what repent means and how it is the doorway to the Kingdom. I've heard the sermon at least twelve times, so my iTunes says.

But tonight I heard something new, which you hope happens after listening to something twelve times or you feel like you've heard it before. He kept talking about honesty and how the Kingdom came crashing in to the hearts in his community when they got honest.

Then it hit me. Honesty is the doorway. To repent means essentially to turn around, but what John was trying to communicate was that if I really want the Kingdom of God to break into my heart in a real way, in a fresh way that transforms my life, I have to first get honest with myself. I have to be honest about what's really in my life and that I need God.

This was a great reframing for me because I've always thought of repentance as this bad thing, where I have to get down on my knees and grovel to God, "I'm not worthy", like some Saturday Night Live skit. But what he was saying was different. I just have to get honest with myself. I just have to get honest with God.

And isn't this what I'm really after in the first place, a place to get honest. I'm so tired of the b.s. that I long for a place to be real. I long for a place to really communicate and share what is on my heart.

Thank you Rick.